Day  : Getting to Austin, TX
The abstract: Drew (first) and Daron (second) each took one for the team and did some crazy multi-state driving to get our humble little band on target. They were each presented with photographic plaques to commemorate their accomplishment. The emails trickled in, congratulating these twin titans of driving for their tenacity.
Then an anonymous email came in, entitled "Slacky Jacky," questioning whether these awards were merely a psychological game that Jack was playing to get off the hook for driving. And, to be fair, that email pretty much hit the nail on the head.
Until, that is, a scheduling mistake on our part presented us with a new challenge: to leave a Library gig in Atlanta at approximately 8:30pm on Thursday and arrive in Austin, nearly 1000 miles away, by 3pm on Friday.
Impossible?
Perhaps.
Or, perhaps, it was instead an opportunity for Jack Forman to drive through the night, earning his own distinguished title. What you're about to read is an hour by hour account of the process of crossing five states in the middle of the night. The aforementioned tin of dinner rolls, 12 in all, will serve as our timepiece. One roll per hour, counting the hours of continguous driving after leaving the Decatur Library at 8:38. Sort of a nod to Sherman Alexie. And now without any further ado, we give you...
THE NIGHT OWL'S FLIGHT.
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Hour 1:
I ate the first roll at 9:38 on the nose (delicious!) and I'm still buzzing from the show at the Decatur Library. No coffee necessary. Drew says he'll run me through a callisthenic routine somewhere around 2 in the morning; he needs a whistle and MacGregor shorts.
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Hour 2:
The rolls? Still delicious. I can't believe it's already been two hours! Daron is sleeping in the fetal position in the back seat as Drew and I rock out to Apples in Stereo across the Alabama border. Is that lightning off in the distance?
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Hour 3:
Um, yes. It was lightning, soon to become the most intense storm I have ever driven through, much less been in at all. Drew used an iPhone App called WeatherBug to plot us a course out of the satellite map of very, very RED storm clouds. Harrowing. The rolls? Still delicious.
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Hour 4:
Still rainy but nothing like what we just went through. The Cars' Greatest Hits became the soundtrack to our stormy hour, a record I may never be able to listen to without my knuckles turning white. It was during this hour that we stopped at a gas station with no water and a Taco Bell with no Taco Bell. Roll #4 is reassuring.
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Hour 5:
Coffee. It's the only thing that got me through it. A mainline of gas station of coffee. Another tip: a cheek full of sunflower seeds is like a little job for your mouth, a zen-like multi-tasking that keeps things on the up and up. Drew, my valliant wingman, doesn't look good. We're in Mississippi, but it could very easily just be a giant road-sized treadmill.
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Hour 6:
The torch has been passed. Drew and Daron have exchanged places. Somewhere in his sleep, Daron picked up a southern accent that he is applying to everything he says. Weird. The rolls are still delicious and we just passed into Lousiana. Is this the halfway point? |
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Hour 7:
It was a Depeche Mode hour. Depeche mode is always there waiting for you when you need them, in this dark little freeway exit off of I-20. Meanwhile, roll number seven didn't need butter- it was smooth like it all on its own. WHAT ROLLS! |
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Hour 8:
Swear on my life that we met a quick stop employee named Billy Bob who said, despite being 82 miles from Texas, we were at least 4 hours away. Is Google playing some cruel trick on us? A second mega-tanker of coffee is propelling this flight.
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Hour 9:
The Eagles Live is, quite possibly, the best driving album that has ever been made. This isn't the Unplugged album either, this one is electric- from back in the day. Don Henley is as unstoppable as Louisiana. I think I could do competitive eating. |
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Hour 10:
Amazingly, the rolls still taste great, each one a bite sized piece of satisfaction. We're now in Texas, a feat that was accompanied by absolutely the best possible song on the radio: "Buenas Tardes Amigo" by Ween. Spanish claps and slide guitar punctuated our crossing. The most epic moment of this tour!
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Hour 11:
Hubris, plain and simple. I can't eat any more rolls. Something happened when we crossed into Texas. Roll #11 went straight into the trash bag. I may never eat bread again. We're taking a shortcut suggested by Gwyneth; Google Maps thinks we're nuts. But the sun is rising in the side view mirrors, this is a good sign.
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Hour 12:
Southern Daron ate the last roll at my behest as we neared Waco. Now just a hop skip and a jump to Austin on I-35. I can't believe I'm still awake. No more rolls and no more time for diary entries.
1. It's 7:38 in the morning Central Time,
2. I haven't slept in over thirty six hours and
3. We're going to make it.
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Jack abruptly stopped taking notes, stopped cracking jokes and hunkered down for three more hours of driving. At precisely 11am, the Recess Monkey tour bus rolled into South Austin's Best Western Hotel where, proudly, Jack is taking a sub-comatose nap.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you Recess Monkey's newest driving chapion...
Say goodbye to "Jack" and say HELLO to:
"THE
NIGHT
RIDER"
You did it, Jack!
Email him to send props!
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We played a really fun small instore show at a toy store in Austin called Kid Genius, set up by the lovely folks at Big Kids Productions. Thanks, Tamara, Ruth and everyone else at Big Kids! And huge thank yous to Kid Genius for letting us play with your toys and make our trademarked "racket." We didn't get any pictures of the show, so here's a gratuitous photo of the Hoff on Kitt.
It's our first time in Austin and we're sure not the last and we're already in love with the place, especially the SoCo neighborhood where we played and subsequently ate amazing food. Now the question is will it be a night on the town?
Or, perhaps, bedtime at 7:30?
By the way, Gwyneth posted pictures, video and words about our Decatur show HERE! Thanks, Gwyneth! These are so cool!
If you haven't already seen her Gooneybird Kids site, it's way cooler than our tour blog :)PREVIOUS || NEXT |  |
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